Mother Chi

I have decided to do a series of posts on Mother Chi's Facebook page in regards to menstruation. You have arrived at the mothership...the place to see them all in consecutive order. This conversation is crucial in changing the birth conversation. How we as women approach pregnancy and birth is deeply colored by how we experienced our first menstruation and how we continue to meet our monthly blood. My mind has been blown by the work of Tamara Slayton. She was a visionary of evolving feminine wisdom who blessed this world with her gifts surrounding menstrual health and the cycles of life. Tamara left us young. Interestingly enough, she passed from complications due to breast cancer. A reminder that, if we hear and answer the call, we are attracted to precisely the work that will meet our deepest wounds. Perhaps wounds that were passed down to us from our ancestors...wounds that technically weren't ours, but ended up being burdens that we must bear. Burdens that awaken us to the collective soul...to something much bigger than just the individual. Tamara's vision was to offer up medicine to the women and men of this world through her revelations and wisdom. Wisdom that she gathered as she dug deeply into herself. Into her cycles. Into a wisdom space that we have been culturally programmed to dismiss and ignore. This work was handed down to me through a bit of divine intervention. I feel blessed and a little overwhelmed at the task of continuing the work that Tamara began. But I have heard the call and I cannot be silent. Tamara's presence is so big and bold in my life right now. I need this healing. We as women need this healing. I ask you to join me in receiving this healing balm. Come with me on a journey to gather and embody the wisdom, healing, and vitality in reclaiming the menstrual matrix! It won't be easy. Lots of agreements and beliefs will come up for you. Self-made and culturally supported rules that perhaps no longer serve you. I invite you to dive in. Meet yourself exactly where you are. Honor all that has brought you to this point. And then be brave. Be very brave. Come. Come. Come. Sit a while with me...and Tamara.

ALL WORDS IN QUOTES ARE THOSE OF TAMARA SLAYTON...

"The menstrual matrix identifies the physiological portals out of which women encounter the evolution of body, soul, and spirit. First menstruation (menarche), monthly menstruation, and menopause...the components of the menstrual matrix...are a series of related experiences that, for better or for worse, allow women access to their soul and spiritual life. Through the various changes during each of these phases, women establish cooperation with, or alienation from, their bodies, souls, and spirits. To the degree they are empowered, educated, and supported during these times of significant change, they will choose a path of empowerment or dysfunction...Our task, as women in a culture that has disowned rhythm and cycles, is to illuminate the rich opportunities that each change brings, to keep the learning process alive, and to anticipate the next phase of female maturation in relation to the last. The menstrual matrix provides a context for reuniting the phases of our lives in relationship to our bodies with an understanding of the maturation of soul and spirit. Our first blood heralds wisdom, our monthly flow deepens our self-knowledge, and the last blood declares our new relationship to the larger community."

"We are bound by our biology to the degree that we are unconscious of the waters we swim in. Womens' conscious relationship to their bodies, their hormones, their reproductive cycles is the key to reproductive freedom. The absence of consciousness regarding the unique terrain of the female fertility cycle and the parallel negative cultural stigma does lay out a predetermined course of life experiences for women who have not examined the realm of their own biology as primarily experienced through medical intervention. We are cyclic. As women, we have sacrificed and been sacrificed on the altar of logical, linear reality...scientific materialism. We have lost years of educating ourselves to the mysteries of ovulation, menstruation, conception and menopause as we gave over the "research" to others...the process by which women make themselves susceptible to manipulation by a science without soul begins at first menstruation. Women loose a significant aspect of who they are when they deny the demands and rewards of the female body. Ultimately alienation from your own physical experience leads to manipulation by those who do know the value of ovum and lining."

When we hear the word fertility, the tendency is to think "baby," which would be correct to some degree, but let us also think of fertility as a time during our cycle when we can open ourselves to inner wisdom, creative insight, and internal medicine...

"A long time ago, women cycled with the moon. They were fertile during the full moon and menstruated during the dark of the moon. Now scientists understand that light stimulates ovulation (the releasing of the woman's eggs). Because women receive light from so many different sources at night now, our cycles are all different. It can be helpful to see the relationship of your cycle to the moon. If you are experiencing irregularity or if you would like to ovulate during the full moon, control the light that falls across your eyes while you sleep. Only allow full moon light into your room for four days during the time you would like to be ovulating...Noting your dreams, in relationship to your cycle, is another window into the terrain of fertility...these dream images add another thread to the rich tapestry we weave each cycle. It is vital to understanding the rhythms of fertility that we begin to note our inner experiences during the night and faithfully record our observations...this is the domain of woman- the inner worlds. Strive to note your dreams for at least one month in relationship to your fertility and at the end of that cycle review the images, insights, and mysteries that wove their way between your night time community and daytime endeavors...consider noting your dream experiences as a poem or a drawing. Charting can give us access to more of ourselves and leads to living a life we love- no matter what age we are."

"Menstrual Matrix Disintegration...

The following represents the sequence of events that may evolve when a young woman is not met with respect and appreciation for her changes starting at first menstruation:

MENARCHE
-First Blood...Initiated into shame and disability
-Discovering that life is not beautiful nor enjoyable
-Losing faith
-Overwhelmed by emotions of despair
-Experiencing the body as prison
-Believing that modern medicine can provide freedom from pain

MENSTRUATION
-Monthly blood...Lacking enthusiasm for life as adventure
-Experiencing dysfunction in the personal realm...physically and emotionally
-Unable to find meaning in life experiences
-Experiencing the body as a victim
-Escalating medical crisis
-Impeded in ability to take action

MENOPAUSE
-Last Blood...Depleted personal power
-Experiencing isolation and alienation
-Displaced from community
-Seeing medical model as source of wisdom
-Striving to maintain youth
-Unable to contribute deeds or public work
-Lacking self-knowledge"

"Menstrual Matrix Integration...

The following represents the sequence of events that may evolve when a young woman is met with respect and appreciation for her changes starting at first menstruation:

MENARCHE
-First blood...Encountering cellular-female wisdom
-Initiated into pride and power
-Longing for goodness, beauty and truth in physical world
-Seeking knowledge through independent judgement

MENSTRUATION
-Monthly blood...Practicing and integrating cellular-female wisdom
-Weaving wisdom and vision into the personal realm
-Seeking personal experience, understanding, action, and responsibility
-Risking adventure
-Working through experiences
-Experiencing aloneness

MENOPAUSE
-Last blood...Living cellular-female wisdom
-Serving the larger community with accumulated wisdom and power
-Guarding life and future generations
-Revealing self-knowledge through deeds
-Recognizing spiritual impulse
-Experiencing intuition and love as tools for transformation"

"Women who have lost touch with the healing opportunity our menstrual cycle offers dive deep into the myriad crises of the female-body-abandoned, i.e. premenstrual syndrome, endometriosis, cervical cancer, painful menopause. We fall prey to the deception that the problem is in us and become preoccupied with the question 'What's the matter with me?' Frequently, we turn to a medical profession that actually propagates the ethics of 'female problems.' We grow weary of the search, which is impossible to conclude for we are looking in the wrong place. We deplete our life energies and ultimately may sacrifice a part of our own body to surgery in an attempt to 'cut out' the problem. Women are called to healing wisdom each menstrual flow. We can listen and determine what is needed in our life for balance and well-being. We meet this wisdom at menarche (first blood), we practice this wisdom throughout our monthly cycles, and we become this wisdom at menopause. We can embrace the female fertility cycle as the education in the art of being female. We do this inner work for our personal well-being and ultimately for the well-being of the planet. To reclaim menstrual health means to validate our natural tendency to withdraw premenstrually, to speak strong truth during our bleeding, to dream profound visions as we flow, to create our life as we will it, and to insist on life for this planet."

"Questions regarding menstruation as medicine...

1. What if the menstrual cycle is a built-in healing mechanism; a system for insuring that the strength and endurance, that is so characteristically female, is replenished and recharged, cyclically?

2. What if women's cycles and the natural ebb and flow to their creative expression reflect a time to be in the world (ovulation), a time to be away from the world (menstruation)?

3. What if this dance of inwardly and outwardly focusing is necessary to maintain feminine biological, psychological, sociological and spiritual well-being?

4. What if the original model for healing, for turning inward to access the unconscious for information to balance one's life, is based on the natural tendency of women to turn inward premenstrually and during their flow?

5. What if women's cycles are medicine for body, soul and spirit?

6. And what if the breakdown so evidenced by 90% of all women suffering with premenstrual syndrome, millions debilitated by endometriosis, hundreds of thousands of needless hysterectomies is simply the abandoned feminine mysteries of ancient healing practices?

7. What if the diseases of a woman's reproductive organs are the result of losing our way to the temple of our own bodies; bodies perfectly designed to self-heal each and every cycle?"

"The Stages of Recovery...

STAGE ONE: Menstrual Alienation

Menstrual alienation is the condition of being outside of one's female experience, of being beside ourselves. Menstrual alienation is the estrangement from the female context.

Webster's Dictionary defines alienation as the act of transferring property, authority, or ownership to another. Women who are alienated from their fertility cycle give over ownership of their experience and assign the property of their lives and well-being to others. This split from woman-self is the result of unfulfilled rites of passage during menarche and of growing up in a culture that encourages shame and embarrassment about menstruation and unconsciousness of fertility.

The cost of our alienation from the wisdom of our own bodies is pain. Our numbness to our own cyclic knowledge is challenged by pain. The modern pain (premenstrual syndrome, endometriosis, severe cramping) many women experience with menstruation is the attempt of our body to call forth soul-consciousness. Our monthly pain demands a new balance between the outer public image of normal with the profound inner feminine quest as revealed premenstrually and during menstruation.

Characteristics of Menstrual Alienation:
-A nagging sense that something is wrong with oneself because one is female. What is wrong with me?
-Concern for appearing normal; that is, unchanging throughout the cycle.
-Fear of behavior being associated with menstruation. This has nothing to do with my menstruation!
-Self-abusive language when describing premenstrual behavior. I am such a bitch!
-Inability to discuss menstrual matters openly with co-workers, family, and especially with daughter. She'll learn that in school.
-Anticipation of menopause as freedom from the Curse.
-Traumatic menarche experience, frequently with memory loss.
-Lack of fertility awareness and inability to identify what phase of the fertility cycle one is in.
-A search for direction and wisdom from outer authorities, particularly modern medical models.
-Denial of the need for whole nutrition, i.e. fast-food junkie.

Questions to ask during menstrual alienation:
1. Are you satisfied about being female? Do you respect yourself as a female?
2. Do you blame yourself for your health condition?
3. Do you openly associate your emotional or physical pain with your menstrual cycle? Can you share about the cyclic nature of your discomfort?
4. How do you speak about yourself or other women regarding menstruation? Are your words kind or self-deprecating?
5. Can you openly discuss concerns about your cycle and get information others might have regarding menstruation or fertility? Can you comfortably bring up the subject of ovulation, menstruation, or conception with you daughter?
6. Do you anticipate menopause as the ultimate relief from menstruation, from being burdened by your monthly flow?
7. Can you remember your own first menstruation?
8. At this moment, do you know what day or phase of the cycle you are on?
9. Do you seek the perfect doctor to remedy your concerns?
10. Do you understand the relationship of whole foods to a pleasurable and empowered fertility cycle?"

"STAGE TWO: Menstrual Crisis
Pain calls our attention to what has been abandoned in ourselves. Our pain is real and must be taken seriously. The root of our pain, however, must be thoroughly understood if we are to heal at the depths of our wound. The menstrual crisis of millions of modern women can be a crucial turning point. During a menstrual crisis, women are being called to decide in their own favor regarding their health or to collude with the cultural unconsciousness of the female fertility cycle. Each crisis is the opportunity to separate from what is alien to our weaving of body, soul, and spirit and to redefine ourselves from the inside out.

Characteristics of a Menstrual Crisis:
-Afraid of losing control
-Consumed by a need to be fixed
-Focused on what is wrong with being female rather than on what is right
-Feeling attacked by one's own body
-Experiencing a sense of isolation, abandonment, despair, hopelessness, and confusion

Questions to ask during a Menstrual Crisis:
1. Do you experience fear about losing control of yourself, your life, your emotions?
2. Do you fantasize about being made right, fixed?
3. Are you thoughts preoccupied with the pain of menstruation?
4. Do you experience your body as an ally or as an enemy?
5. Are you alone in your struggle with your cycle? Do you reach out to others?

Symptoms of Menstrual Crisis:
-Premenstrual Syndrome
-Endometriosis
-Cervical, uterine and breast cancers
-Hysterectomy
-Chronic bladder infections
-Eating disorders
-Substance abuse
-Painful menopause
-Unwanted pregnancy
-Abortion
-Codependency"

"STAGE THREE: Menstrual Observation...
The stage of observation begins when a woman has made the decision to rethink her disease, to uncover the source of her discomforts and to put her well-being first. Observation of symptoms as signs of alienation begins the process of reclaiming the feminine. This stage of witnessing oneself with compassion is crucial to the menstrual matrix recovery process. During observation a woman may discover the following about herself and her recurring concerns:
-The patterns she has developed in order to cope with the denigration of her menstrual experience
-How overtly and covertly she colludes with the negation of her menstrual experience
-How she speaks about herself in regards to menstruation
-How she puts herself last on the self-care list
-How she creates upset in order to get relief from her overwhelming responsibilities to others
-How she passes the legacy of menstrual shame and alienation onto her daughters and trains her sons to distance themselves from menstruating women

Questions to ask during Menstrual Observation:
1. Identify three repeating behaviors or incidents associated with your menstruation.
2. Identify three ways in which you affirm or deny your menstrual experience.
3. Identify how you speak about yourself as a menstruating woman.
4. Identify all those people and projects that require your care and attention and where you place your self-care in relationship to those people and projects.
5. Identify three recurring upsets that you have observed around the time of your menstruation.
6. Identify how you speak to your daughter or son about menstruation."

"STAGE FOUR: Menstrual Health...
As we begin to identify what behaviors are directly contributing to the breakdown in our menstrual well-being, the possibility of health begins to emerge. This menstrual health begins in our soul and surfaces to our cells.

We learn about the profound nutritional needs of the female fertility cycle and the effects of stress on our bio/psycho chemistry. We evaluate our attitudes toward movement and exercise, and we marvel at the immediate relief we receive with physical activity. The debris of years of self-abuse begins to clear and the natural rhythms of menstrual well-being begin to surface. Our confusion and despair slowly lift as we encounter a core of feminine truth, emanating from the rhythms of our body, waiting to be received.

The signs of Menstrual Health include:
-A concern for the quality of food
-A questioning of one's life purpose in regard to being female
-An attempt to honor the need to withdraw premenstrually and during menstruation
-A sensitivity to the rhythms of hormonal fluctuations with a commitment to chart
-A new interest in menstruation and ovulation, based in a female self-respect for cyclic consciousness
-A commitment to challenging one's codependent behavior and connecting with the courage to self-nurture

Questions to ask concerning Menstrual Health:
1. Do you eat white sugar, white flour, caffeine, red meat, dairy products (milk, cheese, butter, etc.), eggs, chocolate, processed foods, fried foods? How often? Would you be willing to chart your food intake for one month to determine the frequency of these foods in your diet?
2. Do you understand the relationship between the above foods and premenstrual syndrome?
3. How do you feel about moving your body? What form of exercise is most satisfying to you?
4. Do you have a sense of your life purpose? What is your life purpose?
5. Do you make time to withdraw into a quiet place before or during your menstruation?
6. Can you determine and express what phase of your cycle you are in?
7. When speaking about your cycle, can you now turn negative assessments into positive understanding?
8. Do you take the time to self-nurture? How, when, where?"

"STAGE FIVE: Menstrual Wisdom...
Wisdom penetrates our cellular changes. We make a place for this wisdom as we embrace our physical process. We begin to speak with understanding of what is true, right, and lasting. We practice guiding and showing the way, in anticipation of menopause, when we become guides for the planet. We venture into the Underworld, the invisible, the unknown, to look, to see, to advise. We grow familiar with our innate feminine knowledge at the cellular level. We prepare the way for the Crone within ourselves.

Characteristics of Menstrual Wisdom:
-Insight and inspiration derived from premenstrual and menstrual experience
-An understanding of the monthly cycle as a preparation for the increased responsibility of menopause and the role of the Crone
-Self-direction with an urgency to life decisions
-Ability to communicate menstrual insight and understanding to co-workers, family, and especially daughters
-Focused study of chosen materials relating to life purpose
-Creation of a community of like-minded, supportive, extended family
-Development of the skills for experiencing multiple realities as fertility wanes

Questions to ask regarding Menstrual Wisdom:
1. What insight and inspiration do you experience premenstrually and during menstruation?
2. With each flow, do you experience yourself as the Crone, the Old Wise Woman?
3. Are you inwardly directed to fulfill your sense of destiny or purpose in life?
4. Do you share your premenstrual wisdom with others? Who?
5. Are you engaged in a particular study that furthers your understanding of your life purpose?
6. Have you created a supportive community around you that encourages your life and growth?
7. Do you experience an expansion of your possibilities as your fertility wanes?

"STAGE SIX: Menstrual Wealth...
After years of integrating wisdom with each cycle, we enter the realm of menstrual wisdom. This is typically the domain of the Crone, the Old Wise Woman, the Grandmother. She is the embodiment of wisdom and speaks out for the entire future. Her concern is the preservation of this planet, the sanctity of life, and the hope of future generations to come. One who has embraced this reality has renounced the confusion of materialism and speaks directly from her natural knowing of the feminine mysteries. She is a source of inspiration for those beginning the journey to menstrual wealth.

Characteristics of Menstrual Wealth:
-Visionary
-Caretaker of future generations and departing souls
-Guardian of the planet
-Mentor to younger generations
-Paragon of inner purpose and direction
-Master of anger as a tool for change
-Seeker of divine direction

Questions to ask regarding Menstrual Wealth:
1. What visions do you carry regarding the future of your life and the planet?
2. What kind of relationship do you have with birth and death?
3. What is your relationship to the planet?
4. What is the quality of your relationships to younger people?
5. Have you determined your purpose and do you receive inner direction?
6. How do you transform anger into acts of charity?"

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Kristina's Magical Birth Story

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Mother Chi Birthing: Practice Offerings

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Reclaiming the Menstrual Matrix